Out of the Wings

Historias íntimas del paraíso (c.1978), Jaime Salom Vidal

Intimate Stories of Paradise : ACT ONE excerpt 1 , ACT ONE, excerpt 2 , ACT TWO, excerpt 1 , ACT TWO, excerpt 2

Intimate Stories of Paradise, translated by Gwynneth Dowling

ACT ONE excerpt 1

Context:

Adam comes across Lily, who has not yet been unwrapped to join him as his companion in Paradise.

Sample text

ADAM:: Shall I unwrap her?
ANGEL:: What if she starts pestering us? What if she wants to get on top of you, like those beasts?
ADAM:: Don’t worry, I’ll put up with it. But I want to. Go on, be a sport, I want to… I really, really want to. I want to! I want to!
ANGEL:: Alright then, go on. But don’t hold me responsible for the consequences.
ADAM:: Hah! Yes, yes, yes!; He claps his hands like a child, spinning around excitedly. ANGEL opens the cellophane egg. The WOMAN immediately moves around normally.
WOMAN:: Hello, good afternoon. Thank you very much for getting me out of there. It was so warm, so closed in. Ah. This is nice. It’s nice to stretch one’s legs now and again. (To ANGEL.) You’re Angel, isn’t that right? (Holding out her hand.) Delighted to meet you. And you’re Adam, isn’t that right? (She kisses his cheek.) Enchanted. I’m your wife.
ADAM:: My what?
WOMAN:: Or you’re my husband, if you prefer. Of course, the situation is most disgusting. A marriage like this, done and dusted, without hardly knowing each other. I can’t take it seriously.
ADAM:: But, are you a man like me?
WOMAN: (She laughs.): Goodness, child. Do I look like a man? Quite the contrary! I’m a female. Or a lady, a woman, whatever you like. And very proud of it!
ADAM:: What’s your name?
WOMAN:: What will I call myself? Lily.
ANGEL AND ADAM:: Lily?
LILY:: Lily, yes. Why are you so surprised? Ah, what beautiful flowers. And they smell so nice. I love spring. I’m a romantic, I must admit. (She puts flowers in her hair.) How do I look?
ADAM:: But…
LILY:: It makes me happy to see the trees so in bloom. The cherries, the chestnuts, the almonds…
ADAM:: How do you know what trees they are?
LILY:: It’s very easy. Because some give you cherries, others chestnuts, and others almonds.
ADAM:: Have you been here before?
LILY:: The things you say! As if you didn’t already know that I’ve only just been created. Same as you. At the same time and from the same mud. We’re twins. Which of course is another issue when it comes to our marriage. It’s not that I’m not open-minded, but come on! A wedding between brother and sister, children of the same Father… Although at best it’s a silly taboo, who knows?
ANGEL:: Who taught you all this?
LILY:: Me? I haven’t moved from inside there. But one can observe, and one can think. What’s more, I’m a woman.
ANGEL:: And what’s that got to with it?
LILY:: We women know lots of things. And what we don’t know, we guess. Incidentally, Angel, honey. Where can I find the Lord?
ANGEL:: Why?
LILY:: I’d like to speak to him about four small things.
ANGEL:: Impossible. He’s resting. You know the effort it takes to create all these marvels… He’s not to be disturbed. That’s why I’m here. What do you want?
LILY:: For now, just the Complaints Book.

Copyright

The above sample taken from the translation Intimate Stories of Paradise by Gwynneth Dowling is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

ACT ONE, excerpt 2

Context:

Lily and Adam have been consulting notes in the instruction manual about copulation. Lily takes offence when Adam assumes he has the right to be on top of her.

Sample text

LILY:: What do you mean ‘lie down’?
ADAM:: Pull down your zip and lie there still on the ground. Let’s see if I can get it right first time.
LILY:: And where are you going to be?
ADAM:: Well, on top, of course. On top of you.
LILY:: With me underneath?
ADAM:: Naturally.
LILY:: Listen, there’s nothing natural about it. There’s lots of ways.
ADAM:: You leave it to me. I’m the man.
LILY:: And what’s that got to do with it? Why on earth do I have to put up with your weight?
ADAM:: One of us has to be on top.
LILY:: And why is it you?
ADAM:: Why not? Listen, that’s enough. If two things are piled together, one of them has to be underneath. It’s logical.
LILY:: So what?
ADAM:: So shut up and do what I say.
LILY:: La, la, la.
ADAM:: What?
LILY:: Or he, he, he, if you prefer. (She blows a raspberry.)
ADAM:: In plain English please, I don’t speak foreign.
LILY:: When it comes to love there are no generals or soldiers. It’s a level playing field. We’re equal.
ADAM:: Listen here, don’t get me started. You and I will never be equal. I’m stronger and taller than you.
LILY:: Yes, but that’s about size. I’m more educated.
ADAM:: I’m heavier.
LILY:: I’m funnier.
ADAM:: I’m more manly.
LILY:: I’m more womanly.
ADAM:: I’ll play football, when they invent footballs.
LILY:: And I’ll sew buttons, when they invent thread.

Copyright

The above sample taken from the translation Intimate Stories of Paradise by Gwynneth Dowling is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

ACT TWO, excerpt 1

Context:

Adam has a new wife, Eve, who has been created to be submissive and naïve. Adam puts a little too much effort into claiming he is happy without his former wife, Lily.

Sample text

ADAM:

Come on, Eve. Stop bothering Angel. We can do this again tomorrow.

EVE:

Whatever you say, Adam. You know best what I should do.

ADAM:

Of course I do. Give me a kiss.

EVE:

With pleasure. (She kisses his hand with great respect.) Are you thirsty? Shall I bring you some cold water from the spring? Or would you rather have some fruit?

ADAM:

Water.

EVE:

Right away. (She wipes his shirt clean with her fingers.) Some leaves have fallen on you. I want to keep you clean and tidy like a gentleman.

(She blows him a kiss and leaves.)

ANGEL:

We didn’t do too badly with her, right!

ADAM:

No, not too badly.

ANGEL:

Pretty, submissive… Just like you wanted. I don’t suppose you’ve any complaints.

ADAM:

She’s a little fatter than the other one, more developed, especially in front. Perhaps you should have used less earth in the mixture.

ANGEL:

You don’t like her?

ADAM:

Yes, of course I do. The more… the better… don’t you think?

ANGEL:

That’s for you to know.

ADAM:

And she’s also a lot more feminine. There’s no comparison! A little porcelain doll. A bibelot.

ANGEL:

I don’t know what a bibelot is. But if you say so…

ADAM:

So sweet, so delicate, so obedient. And as you saw, she even kisses me when I ask her to. Do you know how wonderful it is to have a wife who obeys you? (He clicks his fingers.) Hey, baby… and that’s that. A quiet life.

ANGEL:

Of course.

ADAM:

You could give her all the books in the world, and I bet she wouldn’t open a single one. Not like that know-all other one. I hate intellectuals!

ANGEL:

Although Eve might go a little far. My hand hurts from turning her skipping rope.

ADAM:

Lily made me nervous with her sense of superiority, acting like she knew it all already. She always did exactly what she wanted. Absolutely no respect. And you saw what happened with the apples.

ANGEL:

Don’t remind me.

ADAM: (Furiously.)

I’m in love with Eve! She’s perfect, amazing! I’m in love! You get it?

ANGEL:

How could I not get it, what with you shouting at me?

ADAM:

I’ll say it whatever way I want!

ANGEL:

You can do whatever you like.

ADAM:

Well, that’s okay then.

ANGEL:

Okay then.

Pause.

ADAM:

Where do you think she is?

ANGEL:

She’s gone to get some water…

ADAM:

I’m talking about Lily.

ANGEL:

Oh. I don’t know. Somewhere over there…

ADAM:

Just as long as nothing’s happened to her.

ANGEL:

Don’t worry. She’s very clever.

ADAM:

That’s her greatest fault. I don’t like clever women. Especially when they think they’re clever. I don’t like her manner. I don’t like Lily, not one little bit! You get it?

ANGEL:

I get it, yes.

ADAM:

Look at all the things she said to me. To me, her husband! I can’t put up with that. I’m happy she left. I’m very, very happy!

ANGEL:

Of course.

Copyright

The above sample taken from the translation Intimate Stories of Paradise by Gwynneth Dowling is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

ACT TWO, excerpt 2

Context:

Adam is bored of his childish wife Eve. Lily has returned, and he wants to rekindle his relationship with her.

Sample text

ADAM:: We were good together, you and I, right?
LILY:: Well, sometimes.
ADAM:: I get on great with Eve as well, of course.
LILY:: Of course.
ADAM:: We were a happy couple. We invented the kiss, love, reconciliation…
LILY:: You did your best to ruin it all.; ADAM picks up the golf club and orange, as if about to play a game.
LILY:: What’s that?
ADAM:: Oh, just something silly that I thought would pass the time… Although I don’t need anything… because I’m having a wonderful time.
LILY:: Of course.
ADAM:: I hit the orange with the club.
LILY:: Can I try? (She takes the club.) Where do I have to hit it?
ADAM:: I don’t know…wherever you want.
LILY:: See that hole? That’ll do. (She hits the orange with the club.)
ADAM:: Bravo. Well done. You got it inside. (He takes the club.) Lily… Ever since you left I’ve been bored to tears. All I do is walk around, with the club or without the club. My feet hurt with so much walking.
LILY:: Don’t say that.
ADAM:: It’s the absolute truth.
LILY:: But what about your wife?
ADAM:: The poor girl doesn’t have anything to talk about. She’s only interested in jumping rope and stroking baby animals. Making love to her is like making love alone!
LILY:: That’s enough. I’m going to get angry.
ADAM:: When I think of those notes you took for us to use… Look, I still have them.
LILY:: I don’t want to see them. (She takes another apple and bites it.)
ADAM:: What would call what we’re feeling right now? It’s the first time I’ve felt it.
LILY:: That’s what always happens with us. It’s always the first time.
ADAM:: There’s got to be a name for it.
LILY:: Nostalgia, longing, sadness. You choose.
ADAM:: Or perhaps it’s already invented… Love.; He takes the apple from her, throws it on the ground and they kiss. ANGEL catches them.
ANGEL:: No! I forbid it. Obscene, shameless, adulterers! Adam, she’s the wife of your fellow man!
ADAM:: What fellow man?
ANGEL:: Listen, don’t confuse me. You know very well what I’m talking about.
LILY:: But, Angel…
ANGEL:: Enough with your ‘but, Angel’ nonsense! What sort of Paradise will this turn into if everyone goes around kissing whomever they like?
LILY:: I’m a liberated woman. So whether you like it or not, I’ll always do what I darn well please, to put it politely. See you later. (She leaves.)

Copyright